Monthly Member Meeting | Pre-Marital Mediation – Why NOT?!

Why Pre-Marital Mediation:

After mediating divorce and family matters for over two decades and co-training burgeoning mediators for over 15 years, I am now including a new “pro-active” approach to marriage, determined to help couples embarking on a life together to have the best possible outcome.

Whether it’s their first marriage or a second one, before they say “I do,” I want to help couples give the relationship the strongest possible foundation. Pre-marital mediation helps partners talk through the issues that matter most—money, family, career goals, lifestyle, conflict resolution—so they can enter marriage with clarity and confidence.

Why It Matters:

Love is essential, but lasting marriages thrive on understanding and shared expectations. Mediation creates a safe, guided space to explore sensitive topics before they become sources of stress or resentment.

How Mediation Sets them Up for Success:

• Clear Communication: Learning how to discuss difficult topics constructively.
• Stronger Bond: Build trust and mutual respect by tackling challenges together now.
• Shared Vision: Aligning their values, goals, and long-term plans.
• Practical Agreements: Creating fair, flexible understandings about: finances;  family planning; extended family involvement and holidays; religion and spirituality; politics and world view; how they deal with loss of a loved one, loss of a job, failing health; leisure time vs work encroachment; shared humor; where to live: location as well as home ownership; chores: who does what; handling differences about neatness and clutter; taking care of their physical and mental health; taking care of children and aging parents; how and when  to settle differences and arguments;  All the potential “what if’s about the future that they may not see coming.
• For second marriages:  All of the above in addition to blending families and the challenges when children have different ideas about what they want.
• Is a Pre-Nup a good idea for first marriages; It most certainly is for second marriages and we’ll discuss WHY.

Speaker Bio:
After a successful commercial real estate career, Ada turned her extensive negotiating skills to conflict resolution, divorce and family mediation in 2003. Known among family, friends and colleagues as a natural “bridge-builder”, she trained at the Center for Mediation & Training in New York City where her formal education honed her natural abilities. She is now a co-trainer at that Center, participating in both the 40 hour basic divorce and family mediation training as well as advanced trainings. She also mentors burgeoning mediators and co-hosts a monthly mediation peer group.

Ada is the founder of the Divorce and Family Mediation Center on Long Island, a founding board member of the APFM (Academy of Professional Family Mediators) a former board member, co-host of a monthly peer group and active member of the NYSCDM (New York State Council on Divorce Mediation.    

A lifelong learner, Ada participates in ongoing personal development & transformational seminars and training courses through Landmark Education and EnlightenNext. A student of sociology, psychology, philosophy and ethics she earned a BA from Stony Brook University with a major in Interdisciplinary Studies with a concentration in sociology. 

Ada believes that conflict can be a tremendous opportunity for growth and transformation. She is passionate about helping couples emerge with new possibilities in their relationships as they create a new family structure. From the time she began mediating in 2003, Ada had a vision to open a center for divorcing families to find the support and resources needed to help couples navigate the uncertain and often daunting aspects of divorce. Fulfilling on this aspiration and providing the right resources is extremely rewarding for her. Mediating over 1,000 couples over the past 23 years as well as training and mentoring aspiring mediators, Ada considers it a privilege and a calling to do this enlightened work. 

Ada has presented before the New York State Council on Divorce Mediation, the Family and Divorce Mediation Council of Greater New York; the Employee Assistant Professionals Association; the annual tax symposiums of the National Conference of CPA Practitioners; The Mid Island Clinical Connection, The New York City Clinical Connection and The Long Island Chapter of the Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.

**Guests are welcome to attend one Monthly Member Meeting. To attend again, we invite you to join our association**